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'It's hard to define why we clicked,' says Miriam, 54, 'but perhaps after one marriage and four years of dating, I was better equipped to judge a good man.Mark is kind, patient, loving and completely selfless.*Editor’s note: Names of some of the interviewees have been changed for privacy.Annette Wheeler* didn’t recall the exact moment she first heard the term “cougar,” but she did remember dashing to her computer to look it up.She never analyzed her attraction to younger men (or their attraction to her), but with “cougar” an increasingly popular term used to describe older women dating much younger men, her longtime preference is suddenly in the spotlight.For Wheeler and other women like her, younger men — many of them 15 years or more their juniors — are a natural fit.Miriam Gray endured 13 years of upheaval and heartache before concluding that it had all been worth it.

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Widowed, separated, or divorced, a growing number seek young men for dating and companionship.Their leader of the flock, Tom Baer, 73, preaches from the center of the room, reading from pieces of paper.Members don’t have religious texts to follow along and aren’t allowed to take notes.In official documents, the tax-exempt church is called Congregation for the Light.To members, it’s just “the Light.” The group has about 200 members in New York, and there are congregations in Washington, DC, and Atlanta, Baer and ex-followers say. Santa Barbara Matchmakings Lisa Darsonval can help.

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