If you are boring and a one-dimensional person, finding an intellectually challenging man is not going to change who you are. (If you are not sure what they are, ask your mother! Learn some humility by volunteering to serve others. Get some counseling if you need to learn to be assertive or how to share your feelings. Big can be beautiful if you manage things correctly. To be a temporary fix until I decide I want something better? If you are hanging with a bunch of complainers who only know how to gripe, maybe it is time to find some new friends.
If you are lazy and self-centered, finding a generous hard working fellow is not going to transform you. Travel abroad and see how fortunate we are in the USA. Some men like a woman with a little meat on her bones, but no one wants a slob. Although he has a gentle manner and is he able to be silly when it is appropriate? No one is going to be everything you have ever dreamed of.
He believes in you, and pushes you to be the most awesome version of yourself.
I’m saying someone cheated or lied or failed to keep a big promise to you. Would the relationship ultimately still be worth the pain it would take to save it?
And yet, you still feel like a 12-year-old trapped in an adult’s body, so the whole idea of MARRIAGE is a little… Given this inner struggle, you eventually have to decide with each guy you date: Are you still just having some young fun with this person, or is he THE ONE? You like him because, obviously, it’s nice to have someone who embraces you for who we are and lets you be comfortable in your own skin.
Of course, just sitting back and enjoying the ride an option. But people change and grow, and we want someone who’s going to help us through that process, not hold us your ex. You were bored, trying to get over an ex or all your friends were in a relationship and you felt left out.
Continuing on this topic, research suggests that may lead a person to be more likely to agree to a date.
This phenomenon is known as the "Foot-in-the-Door" (FITD) effect.
If you’re being a total dick, he’ll call you out because he knows you’re better than that.
For those who remained shy or anxious, I also explained how to ask someone out in a more indirect way (here).
Further, I explained how such requests could be crafted with a bit of persuasion for added effect too (here).
Finding the right man is not going to change you into a better person than you already are. Volunteer and expose yourself to people who are less-fortunate than you are. Accept yourself for who you are, but don’t use that as an excuse to let yourself go either. Can he relax socially and can talk to almost anyone?
You will only be happy in your new relationship if you are happy inside first. Rather than living up to some super-model or stereotype of femininity you should aim to be all you can.
Randomly, the men either asked for an immediate date with the woman, or asked her for a small favor first (specifically, a light for his cigarette or directions).